“Helping Others Is A Form Of Self-Pity”?

In response to Jason’s comments about wanting to be a psychologist, I may have to pivot. The only danger is that I don’t want to swamp him: pouring a gallon of gas on a lighted match is likely to extinguish it. I can’t be too enthusiastic.

BUT…there are a few things I’ve been waiting for and this is fascinating. I need to do a core dump of my thoughts.

1. “Helping other people is a form of self-pity.” That was a comment by one of my more cynical teachers. But I understand what he meant: that you can avoid doing YOUR work by constantly finding other people who need help. Until you have health in all three arenas, it would be safest to assume that you shouldn’t get down in the water and drown with people, but stand on the dock and throw them a life preserver. The most important thing is to trigger your survival drive, so that there is a rabid wolf defending yoru boundaries. Known entirely too many “helpers” who couldn’t look at their own wounds and help themselves. But Jason has that survival drive…possibly turned up to “eleven.” I actually need to cool him down a little: the whole world isn’t a threat. And committing to help others could be the touch of “Yin” I need.
2. I’ve needed him to select a life goal that actually has a believable path to accomplishment. Wanting to be a Pro athlete or a rapper is more a childhood dream, something to boast to friends about, not something that has a good straight line between childhood and adulthood.
3. The path is something I…