Playing Spiritual Tetris

“When there is no fixed destination, you cannot ever lose your destination, so you cannot ever lose your path, so nothing that happens in your life can take you off your path. Your path IS what happens, and what happens IS your path. There is no other.” — Jeff Foster

Continuing to explore and unpack the conversation I had with my friend Tim Tuesday. Told him that I’d reached aa point in my life where, while I know many who are better than me at the individual pieces of my life, in the aggregate they define a path where I no longer have teachers and mentors. Tim’s reaction was that my feeling now, the place I stand, is perfect, and that in essence I’m emerging from a cocoon. This moment in time, however long it lasts, is perfect. The confusion is perfect. The interesting thing is that if I’m in the space of just martial arts, or just writing, or just parenting and partnering I have clarity.

But the “who is Steve?” routine has broken down. I no longer have an answer, and that is fine. Perfect. One of the most distinct goals I had from waking up at ##$%% 4am to see my friend was to gain clarity on the road ahead. The part of my mind that likes structure REALLY likes it. Needs it, possibly just to distract itself.

This might be like “second attention”, focusing one part of my mind on say, binge-watching Netflix while doing relatively mindless corrections on a manuscript. I can do that all day long if I give myself something to amuse me in the background. This desire, to have something to focus on “fovially” while…