Sleeping With The Goddess

The concept that our life partners, our love partners, are our equals seems odd to some people. There are only two real options other than equality, and both of them seem toxic to me, although one is seen as “cute”

1. People who think their wife or husband is beneath them. These people put down their partners constantly, talk about who else they might have had, talk about being trapped, and keep a roving eye. Any time, and I mean ANY time I find my mind even flirting with that direction I remind myself that I chose Tananarive, and if I’d thought I could do better, I sure as hell would have. I CHOSE HER. If I am EVER frustrated (and everyone gets frustrating at times. I know I must be hella frustrating to live with at times, no slightest doubt.) remember that no one forced us together. So…if I put her down, I’m questioning my own judgement. And if my judgement is poor, then that lowers my points, doesn’t it? From that perspective, if I don’t respect her, I’m not respecting myself.

What does this say to people trapped in genuinely bad relationships? GET OUT. Really. Millions do, every year. If you can’t do it now, lay your plans. “A year from today I’ll be gone” has worked for countless people. If you can’t do it for yourself, do it for the little girl, the little boy inside you.

2. People who think their wife or husband is above them. This one gets the “awww…isn’t that cute” reaction. Frankly, I’ve never trusted it. When you put your mate on a pedestal, you are just counting the hours until they fall off. Then you can…