The Gift Of Failure

I saw a recent post complaining about parents who want their children to be tough, and therefore place obstacles in their path, refuse to provide them with everything they want (I may be overstating their position, but this is roughly accurate.)

My thought is that stress is necessary for growth. The parent who protects their children from everything is only reasonable if they can CONTINUE to protect them through life…which they cannot. “Life is hard” they reason, and believe that even if they protect their children in every way, they’ll adapt when they have to.

The problem with this is that there are “windows” for various sorts of growth and development in the human body and mind. Languages are best learned in early childhood, and so are things like walking and basic logical distinctions. We are simply more open, more flexible, more capable of learning in youth, as far as raw potential goes. As we age, we lose that NATURAL genius, and what we have is the interaction of our most deeply engrained knowledge and experience. This is one reason why world-class scientists often “peak” in their 30s and 40’s, but great teachers often display great brilliance into their ninth decades…if they laid down the proper foundation in early life.

The same thing is true of learning how to deal with stress. You have to have those experiences while your parents provide a “safety net”. When failure is a bad grade, rather than a lost job or a trashed marriage or a fatal crash. Failure is a natural part of the process, and I’ve never, ever seen an…