The Goldilocks Gambit

Steven Barnes
3 min readNov 25, 2020

BREATHE!!

Something new this morning: Jason did his Morning Ritual (“All the energy I need is within me now. All the Clarity I need is within me now”) while doing Turkish Get-Ups. And ENJOYED it. I will be damned.

Whatever challenges life brings you, one thing that is true is that you have the best change of dealing with them if you put yourself into your best mood, best STATE, before attempting to solve it. Whether it is my estimation that would take thirty years for the culture to change enough for me to have a chance to success (how the HELL do you manage your state for three decades of frustration?) or the need to manage my state in a moment when Jason is angry or melting down (this hasn’t happened in MONTHS since I mastered this secret) STATE MANAGEMENT is critical.

In fact, my current life is exploding: My family is doing better than ever, every career opportunity I’ve ever looked for is being laid on my table, and physically I have the energy and aliveness to really ENJOY this journey.

I don’t say this to impress you, but rather to impress UPON you that it really, REALLY is possible to be healthy, and happy, and successful…and that all you have to do is model those who have done it…then YOU will be one of those people and be able to help others!

Because Jason wants to teach my system, I’m having to really think more deeply about what I built into the WARRIOR’S JOURNEY, which is the most recent and powerful iteration of Lifewriting.

I.D.E.A. (Instinctive Designation of Energy and Attention) says that every activity has a perfect balance of focus and relaxation. Too much “Yang” and you are wasting energy and taxing your mental or physical recovery reserves. Too much “Yin” and you aren’t tapping into your real power and advancing your skills and strengths.

It is the balance that is critical. It’s a Goldilocks world: not too hard, not too soft.

How can you find this balance?

1) Determine your goals in all three arena: physical, emotional, mental (the most common one would be weight loss, relationships, and money. Use the S.M.A.R.T. goal system (Specific, Meaningful, As-if Now, Realistic, Time-Bound).

2) Find role models of success in each arena. What was their Hero’s Journey?

3) Use the Morning Ritual to drive in the values, beliefs, role models and emotional states you determine give success in…

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Steven Barnes

Steven Barnes is a NY Times bestselling author, ecstatic husband and father, and holder of black belts in three martial arts. www.lifewritingpodcast.com.